


The Problem With Meaches

by FamiliarFan



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Anthropomorphic Plants, I don't know what to call this Alternate Universe, I just made this shit up, Multi, Multiple Bills, Plant Procreation, Queen Dipper, mentions of other relationships, smol and sassy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-28
Updated: 2017-02-02
Packaged: 2018-08-27 14:46:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8405755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FamiliarFan/pseuds/FamiliarFan
Summary: Wendy thought she scored big time when she stumbled upon a young Queen Meach all by himself. Her dreams of saving the farm, and her family's reputation as the world's best Meach farmers, comes to a halt. Starting with those damned yellow, gold, and black Drone Meaches. Oh, and the poaching, kidnapping, and murder. Let's not forget that.
The idea for this strange fanfic came from the episode "The Meach Harvest" from the show Chowder. I stress on LOOSELY based off the episode.





	1. Soos meets "Dipper"

The crunch of frost underneath heavy boots broke the early morning silence. A red haired young woman lead the way through the forest, a portly man wearing a gray cap followed closely behind. The pale, cold light showed the way through the thick pine trees as they trudged on, careful not to snap any branches or kick any rocks. They wanted to be as quiet as possible.

 

The man was running out of breath. Puffs of smoke left his mouth rapidly and sweat beaded down his face. He paused and set the backpack he was carrying over his shoulder onto the ground. He rested his hands on his knees as he wheezed.

 

The woman turned around at the sound of the small clatter. “Soos? You okay, buddy?”

 

The man, Soos, removed his cap and wiped his brow with his arm. His brown hair was a mess. “Dude, Wendy,” the man panted out. “How much longer are we going to be hiking?”

 

Wendy set down her bag and walked over to her friend. She patted his back as he tried to catch his breath. “Not much longer. Maybe if you took off your jacket you’d feel better.”

 

Soos nodded at her suggestion and shrugged off his green jacket. He tied it around his waist and grabbed his bag, slinging over his shoulder. “Okay, dude. I’m ready- let’s go.”

 

Wendy grinned, grabbed her bag, and continued to lead their hike. “If you need to take a break in the future, just tell me.”

 

“Nah, I’ll be okay. I’m just excited for whatever it is you’re going to show me.” Soos eyed Wendy. “You sure this will save the farm? I mean, if we have to travel this far from it are you certain that it’s even worth it?”

 

Wendy rolled her eyes. “Yes, Soos, I’m positive this will be a really big game changer. Lazy Susan is going to flip her shit when we bring it back.”

 

“That brings up another thing I was wondering,” the two stopped at a fallen log. Soos crouched down and folded his hands. Wendy stepped down and he hoisted her up. She struggled for a bit, but found a good grip on the nearby branch and set herself on top. Soos handed her the bags and watched as she disappeared on the other side. “Why didn’t you just grab it when you saw… whatever this thing is?”

 

Soos found his way up on the log on his own and met his friend on the other side. Wendy was taking out binoculars from her bag when he finally caught up to her. She raised a finger to her lips, signaling for him to be quiet, and ushered the larger man over. Soos nodded and cautiously made his way over. The first thing Soos noticed was the sweet aroma. It smelled like peaches, only lighter and with hints of cinnamon and vanilla. It reminded him of his grandmother when she would bake pies during the late summer of his youth. Soos closed his eyes and inhaled the lovely smell, pausing to enjoy the nostalgic feel. He opened his eyes, and then noticed the two of them were now next to an open meadow, the tall grass hiding their figures. In the center of the grassy plains was a low hanging tree with strange blue flowers sprouting on the branches and trunk. A strange mass of blue and white was nestled within the branches, seemingly where the flowers were coming from. Soos tried in vain to get a good look, but it was too far to clearly see whatever it was. 

 

Soos furrowed his brow in confusion. “Dude, what is that?”

 

Wendy smirked and handed him the binoculars. Soos hesitated but grabbed them from his friend’s hands. He held them up and peered through the lense. A closer looked revealed the flowers, small blue buds clustered around the lighter mass, in much greater detail. The lump in the tree was still for a second, then slightly moved up and down, only to pause before it repeated the motion. Whatever it was, it was breathing. 

 

Soos looked away and lowered the binoculars, staring at his friend. She still held the sly smirk and nodded her head toward the tree. Soos took the sign and looked through the lens again.

 

The mass kept up it’s gentle breathing for a bit longer, until it shuddered suddenly. A small arm stretched out from it, and a humanoid form sat up and yawned. It looked like a young boy with light blue skin covered in flowers similar to the ones clinging to the tree, only with hints of white in the petals, covering him to from his shoulders to his knees. He was thin and small, with short dark blue locks framing his face in an untamed manner, a little flower crown sat on top of his head, and big doe like eyes blinked his sleepiness away. The strange boy stretched his arms, the white petals fluttering around him, almost as if the flora was somehow a part of him. The boy reached down his lap, which was partially hidden from view from all the flowers surrounding him. When his hands came back up they were covered with a sticky, gold substance that shined in the early rays of the sun. The boy began to eat the substance, looking tired and content. 

 

Soos turned to his friend wide-eyed. “Seriosuly dude, I'm kind of lost. What is that thing?”

 

Wendy took the binoculars away from his grasp. “That 'thing' is a Meach.”

 

Disbelief painted Soos’ face as Wendy brought the binoculars to her face, watching the Meach eat. “ No way...” Soos chuckled a little as he looked over to the tree again. From the distance he could see the figure of the Meach, but just barely. “I thought they were endangered or something… And where's the hive? I thought they lived in hives.”

 

“Well, yeah, they are super rare to find now. And, technically, yes; Meaches are meant to be in colonies, not ‘hives’.” Wendy hummed in delight. “Unless it’s a virgin Royal Meach that hasn’t been claimed.”

 

Soos looked back at the low hanging tree. The field was quiet, and the little Meach was content and oblivious to the world around him. It was an odd sight to see, since normally Soos was used to watching nature shows that showed a Meach’s home buzzing with life. “I’ve never seen one in person before. Let alone one all by itself.”

 

Wendy nodded. “Yep. And we are going to take this little guy home with us. And I need your help.” 

 

Soos looked back to his friend, who was putting the binoculars away and rummaging through her bag. “What? Are you serious! Dude, I don’t think we can do that! Meaches, like, super hard to take care of and stuff.”

 

Wendy pulled out rope and some cloth. “Remember when I said that my family use to own a farm?” Soos nodded. “Well, one of the things we raised were Meaches, so don’t worry, I know what I’m doing. I’ve already started getting him familiar with me. All of this,” she held up the rope and a small hunting knife, “is just precaution in case we run into trouble.”

 

Soos quirked a brow. “I also find it kind of weird that it’s a boy and you’re saying it’s a Royal Meach. Can’t only girls be Royal Meaches?”

 

Wendy was counting off tiny little pellets,placing them back in a clear bottle. “Not necessarily. A Royal Meach is a Meach that can produce Royal Jelly. You’re thinking of Pompquats and Gigiherberries. Gender has nothing to do with it with this species,” she put everything back in her bag, then let out a sigh. “Did you bring the gas gun and extra rope?”

 

Soos patted his backpack. “Yeah, dawg.” His gaze shifted between Wendy and the Meach. “So, if he trusts you, can't you just pick him up and we take him back to the farm?”

 

Wendy stood up and brushed off her knees. She gave her friend a serious look. “It's not that simple. Royal Meaches are fucking stubborn, and it took me a lot longer than I thought to get him to trust me. But spring is here, and we are running out of time. I have been lucky before with this little guy, but his scent is getting stronger. Fuck, even us humans can smell it from all the way over here. It's getting to the point that it can attracted... unpleasant company.” The silence followed by her statement made her groan. “You know… certain anthropomorphic plants we don’t need getting in our way?” Soos shrugged. “Dude, he’s already starting to fill himself up with that goo. What do you think is going to happen?”

 

Soos’ eyes widened at the implication. “Right, you said he was unclaimed…”

 

“Exactly. Which is why I need you to keep a lookout in case something happens. Hopefully, getting him to come with me will be no problem… At least, right now it won’t be a problem.” She squared her shoulders and stared forward. “Now, follow me. Be prepared for anything and keep your eye out.”

 

Soos nodded, then watched as his friend and coworker disappeared into the tall grass. He followed closely after her. The forest was waking up all around them. The few song birds twittering before became a chorus and the light from sun was warming up and melting the night’s leftover frost. Bugs were humming in his ear, but he brushed them away. The tall grass was damp and the ground was soft, making their steps quiet. The tree was coming closer to view, same with the young Meach perched in the tree. The scent was becoming too much, making Soos worried. He did not feel like dealing with predators like bears or mountain lions, or the potential threat of Drone Meaches who picked up on the scent. The little Meach himself was still eating the Royal Jelly, taking his time to enjoy the surroundings. His cheeks were puffed and sticky and he had a big smile on his face. Soos could hear his light humming, and couldn’t help but get distracted with how innocent he looked at that moment.

 

Wendy pushed out her hand once the two were at least ten feet away from the tree. Soos stopped, and Wendy signaled him to stay. He gave her a thumbs up, and she nodded. She stood tall as she made a brisk walk toward the tree. The Meach’s back straightened and his ears perked up. He turned around and visibly relaxed at seeing the redhead. 

 

Wendy cooed up at the Meach. “Hey, Dipper. Long time no see, buddy!”

 

The Meach sat up and leaned over to get a better look at the woman. He hummed happily, a wide smile spreading over his face. 

 

“I got something for you. I think you know what it is.” Wendy teased. As she reached into her bag the Meach carefully climbed down from the tree. He landed with grace, and stared at her with curious brown eyes. He tip-toed closer, and Soos could see that the Meach was about the same height and stature as an adolescent, coming up to Wendy’s chest. Wendy pulled out the bottle with pellets, and the Meach hummed in delight, stretching out his sticky hands toward her.

 

She chuckled. “I knew you’d be happy to see these. You guys love this stuff,” she popped a few into his hands, and he quickly put them in his mouth. He chewed loudly. Wendy chuckled. “Hey, do you want more of these?” She shook the bottle infront of his face.

 

The Meach nodded, but the rest of the conversation was ignored. Soos heard a snap not too far off, and it made his hair stand on end. “Crap,” he mumbled to himself. He reached into his backpack and pulled out his gas gun. The chemical was harmless; it was designed just to scare away predators. Perfect for anything that was hiding in the brush.

 

He kept his eyes out for any sudden movement, but it was eerily quiet. Soos did not like that at all. He glanced back to his friend to see her still talking to the Meach. The Meach’s expression twisted from happy to pensive, but Wendy’s tone was still easy going. Soos stilled when another rustled was heard, this time getting closer. The grass was too thick, and he didn’t want to panic and ruin his friend’s chance. A twig snapped and this time Wendy went quiet.

 

“Soos,” Wendy muttered. “What was that?” Wendy moved a protective arm to cover the Meach as her eyes shifted around suspiciously.

 

Soos quietly and quickly made his way over. The Meach flinched and moved behind Wendy, warily staring up at the larger man. Soos continued, “I think we should get outta here, dude. I can’t see whatever it is and it sounds like it’s coming closer.”

 

Wendy cursed. “Damn. Hey, Dipper,” the Meach looked up at the red head with confused eyes. “I know this is really sudden, but you need to trust Soos,” she pointed toward the man whom awkwardly waved at the plant. “I promise nothing bad will happen, okay?”

 

The Meach stared back and forth between the humans, hesitating. He was about to nod when suddenly a gold vine wrapped around his waist. He let out a yelp as he was dragged back into the thick grass before Soos and Wendy could grab him. As soon as the blue plant was gone, there was a low hissing coming from all around. Soos pointed his gun carelessly into the brush, but Wendy held his arm. “Don’t! What if you hit Dipper!”

 

Soos was about to protest but the brush around them caught on fire. Blue flames came up as high as their knees and tall figures stood up, surrounding the two. There were about four figures, and all were slender, and covered in foliage similar to Dipper’s, only their colors were yellow, black, and gold. It was hard to make out the various patterns with the flames rising higher and closer.

 

“Yo, dude, what are they? What’s happening?” Soos panicked.

 

Wendy snarled and reached into Soos’ backpack. “They’re Drone Meaches! This is why I didn’t want to come alone!”

 

Taking out a small blue ball from the sack, Wendy threw it toward the ground. A burst of water killed out a portion of flame, making one hiss and his gold petals turn ruby red. Wendy grabbed Soos’ arm and ran while the Drone was distracted. They kept running, hearing snarls behind them. The grass rustled and Wendy and Soos were in a full sprint.

 

Until a pale yellow Drone stopped in front of the two a few feet away. Wendy and Soos skidded to a halt and were about to turn but found themselves surrounded by red, angry Drone Meaches. 

 

Wendy tsked. “Fuck, I knew I should have taken Dipper sooner. His scent was weak when I first met him.”

 

Soos pointed the gun at the Drone Meaches and gulped. “Well, we might not make this, so since we might die, I just wanted to let you know that you made my job at the farm worth it.”

 

Wendy nodded. “That’s flattering but we’re not dead yet.” She reached into her back and pulled out an axe in a flash. The hissing and growling increased as she took stance, ready to take down the hormonally stressed out males. “On the count of three, we fight. One, two, thr-”

 

Until a small blue figured jumped between her and a dark Drone Meach. Wendy backed up a bit, and watched as the red patterns turned back into pale yellows and golds. Gold and blue eyes stared at the young Meach. Dipper held his arms out in an attempt to protect the two humans.

 

His voice chirped in displeasure, and Soos and Wendy could only stand there, surrounded by the males, and watch as the small Meach clicked and hummed. As Dipper continued to ‘scold’, the other Meaches relaxed and simply glare at the two humans. Dipper finished his little speech and made a huffing noise, pouting and crossing his arms. The one Drone Meach closest to him stared for a few seconds longer, then made a low purring sound. The other Drones slowly made their way around Wendy and Soos to stand next to the young Meach. Dipper glared at them for a bit more until they started to head back to the tree where Dipper made his home. One smaller male, with a head of blonde hair, gold and black flora, caramel complexion and a single gold eye, lingered. He gave a small chirp.

 

Dipper turned and nuzzled Wendy’s hand, then smiled at Soos before turning around and walking toward the Drone Meach. The male smirked. Gold vines popped out of his back and wrapped gently around Dipper’s waist. He coaxed him closer, and Dipper obliged. He looked back at the two humans, gave a small smile, and then they disappeared into the tall grass.

 

Soos stood there, dumbfounded. “....So, what just happened?”

 

Wendy pinched the bridge of her nose. “Things got more complicated.” She gave an exasperated sigh. “But at least Dipper stopped them from killing us. That’s a good sign at least.”

 

She silently gathered her things and continued to walk, followed by a rightfully confused man. “But… what about Dipper?”

 

Wendy shrugged. “He got those horny Drones off our tail. We should be grateful. I plan not to come back for another week.” She turned to give her friend a defeated grin. “They’re going to be busy trying to court him and convince him to be their Queen. It’s best if we leave them alone.”

 

Soos nodded, but still looked back to the tree with worry. “They seemed really aggressive. You sure the little guy is going to be okay?”

 

“Oh yeah. He’ll be fine. Dipper might look tiny and frail, but a Queen has a final say. We’ll come back in a week to make sure he’s doing alright. If those Drones are still there by then, they’ll be use to the pheromones in the air and be more tolerant of us... Hopefully.” She paused in her steps. “Though, I’ve never seen a species of Drone Meaches produce fire like that. Huh… I’ve got some homework to do when we get back…” 

 

Soos pondered that for a few moments before enjoying the peace and letting himself relax on the hike back home. He never dealt with Meaches before, but his first impression was a roller coaster of exciting and terrifying. He hoped this would all be worth it in the end.


	2. This Is Why We Do Our Homework

‘Lazy’ Susan’s farm was, in the nicest words possible, a sore sight to see. There was a time when the withering trees were lush with various fruits, like lemons, oranges, apples, and pears. But now most of the trees were decaying, only a few producing adequate fruit. If one were to ask the woman herself what caused this in the first place the answer would always be different. The soil was turning sour, termites ate at the trunks of the trees, the weather hasn’t been fair on her plot of land, there wasn’t enough hands for hire to help maintain the orchards, and so forth.

 

But the truth was that ‘Lazy’ Susan had absolutely no idea what she was doing.

 

From what Wendy understood, Susan inherited the farmland when she was in her thirties. Around that time she had nothing else really going for her, so she decided to use the small fortune to start up her family’s orchard again. Gravity Falls was well known for the agriculture industry, so it sounded like a good idea to a hopeful young woman. But it became very clear very fast that she had no clue how to raise up a healthy crop. With the money dwindling fast and hardly enough profit coming in, Susan became desperate and opened a diner with the remainder of her savings. From what little she produced she made seasonal pies and jam, which were delicious, but it was obvious that the farm was a financial thorn in Susan’s side and the treats were not making enough to money to cover the cost of maintaining and producing her goods.

 

Wendy had tried to bring back the farm to it’s former glory, but years of neglect made the project seem hopeless. Even with the help of her friends and Soos, Wendy’s green thumb was no match for the difficult land that seemed to scorn the elderly woman’s dreams of reviving the family’s farmland.

 

Wendy was thinking about all of this on her way to work. She pedaled her old bike down the country roads with a heavy backpack over her shoulders. The thoughts made her somber. Susan meant well, and was willing to hire her at a young age when she barely had the funds keeping Soos around. She was a bit ditzy, but she made sure she made enough to ensure everyone was happy and somewhat well off, which made Wendy proud to say she worked for her. The older woman sacrificed a lot for her and the others, and now was the time to pay her back.

 

Wendy’s eyes snapped up as the brown fields came into view. The smell of wet dirt from the rain and distant pine filled her lungs, leaving her relaxed. The morning sun painted the scene pale with lavender mountain tops in the distance, the farm still in the forests’ shadow. Her lips curved in a small smile, looking upon the barren fields with hope. If all went well, ‘Lazy’ Susan, Soos, and herself would be set for life. She chuckled to herself as she pulled up to the small farmhouse. Susan was absent, seeing as she was in town most of the time taking care of her Greasy’s Diner, so the small building was converted to a small shop where they could sell their product. But with the way things are, it was more like a convenience store.

 

Wendy parked her bike on the rack near the entrance, locked it in place, then walked in. The dinging announced her presence, making the girl with purple hair look up. She had a bored expression, stocking the front shelves with little enthusiasm, but her dark eyes lit up seeing her red haired friend. “Hey, Wendy. Looks like we’re going to be working together today.”

 

“Hey, Tambry.” Wendy walked over to the time cards and punched in, moving the card from ‘out’ to ‘in’ and signing the clipboard on the side. “I thought Robbie was working the shop today.”

 

Wendy heard Tambry shuffle with the boxes near her feet. “No, he called out. He said he’s sick, but after yesterday’s fight I think he just doesn’t want to see you right now.”

 

Wendy huffed in annoyance. “I hardly ask for days off, and the one time I do Robbie has a fucking tantrum. Ugh! He can be such a child sometimes.” She clasped on her name tag and moved to the ‘employee lounge’ to drop off her backpack. “I’ll see you around break time.” Tambry made a sound of acknowledgement, too engrossed with stocking the shelves to give a proper answer. 

 

The backroom was a reasonably sized area. It had a couch and chairs, a television on an desk matching the coffee table, and a small kitchen area was visible with a fold table and chairs meant for eating on. It wasn’t much, but they were grateful for the space. Wendy plopped her bag on the couch carelessly, then headed toward toward the kitchen and to the side door, already knowing Soos was out in the fields. 

 

Sure enough, the large man was already in the giant shed. He was rummaging through the tools, searching for whatever he needed to find and oblivious to the approaching woman. Wendy called out to him, making him look up. He scrambled to meet her halfway, a look of excitement on his face.

 

“Dude, Wendy, did you make it to the library yesterday?”

 

“Yep,” she saluted. “I got everything on rare plants and Meaches I could find. I was surprised the librarian let me take all those books home.” The two walked back to the shed as she continued to speak. “I skimmed through them yesterday, taking a few notes for you, but the promising ones I brought in today. When we take our lunch break today we can go over them and research together.”

 

Soos fist-bumped the air. “Yes! Awesome, dude! We can actually fix and do something about this place. ‘Lazy’ Susan is going to be so happy when we tell her everything. I can see it now,” Soos stopped to spread out his arms, staring at the empty orchard. “Soon these trees will be home to a colony, and we’ll bring in so much money, ‘Lazy’ Susan wouldn’t have to worry about anything else. Our jobs would be secure, and we’ll be on the map, and best of all I’ll finally get to try real Meach fruit!”

 

Wendy laughed at Soos’s excitement and smiled. The sun’s golden rays lit up the earth, bringing warmth and a bit of hope. “Yeah… a whole new chapter is waiting for us.”

 

\---

 

It was past noon when Soos and Wendy made it back from the fields. Wendy wiped the sweat off her hands before reaching for the doorknob and entered the building. She held it open for Soos, who gave a muttered thanks. It was clear they were both already exhausted. For weeks they prepped the earth for spring in hopes that the new trees would take root and produce a decent harvest, but unfortunately only a third started budding this morning. Wendy could just hear the pitter patter of coin being tossed into the truck along with the dead trees. At least they could sell the wood chips and logs for a bit longer before the weather warmed up.

 

Soos strolled straight to the fridge, rummaging through the contents to make himself a sandwich. Wendy peeked in and saw that a pitcher of sweet tea still had enough for a tall glass for them both and smiled. She walked into the sitting area and grabbed her backpack, grunting at the weight and her already sore muscles. She lugged the thing over her shoulder and stepped back into the kitchen. She dropped the backpack onto the table with a large ‘thud’ and walked over to the fridge.

 

Soos looked up from his deli creation. “Oh, we’re doing that now? I kinda wanted to eat first, dude.”

 

Wendy poured herself the amber liquid into her favorite tall glass. It was thin and had a briar rose pattern on the side. “And you can eat and help me out after. I just want to get started before we get too relaxed.” She put the tea away and walked back to the table, taking large gulps from her glass.

 

Soos sighed. “You still need to eat. What do you want on your sandwich?”

 

“Anything but pickles.” Wendy distracted herself with opening her bag and pulling out the five texts and the laptop she brought with her. She opened the device and waited for the screen to load, glancing at the various books. She grabbed and opened the one titled ‘Anthropomorphic Plants and Their Behavior’ and skimmed the pages to a pink tag she used as a bookmark. She heard two clinks and saw her sandwich waiting in her peripheral vision. She didn’t touch it just yet.

 

“So, what kind of books did you get?” Soos smacked around his bite. 

 

“Just a few to help us figure out what kind of Drones we are up against. I wasn’t able to read all of these books, but I marked the pages that looked promising. I brought my laptop just in case these aren’t helpful. It’s weird, I have never seen anything like what we saw last week.” She paused as her eyes flicked from the loading screen to the black letters. “I didn't even know Meaches had pyrokinesis…” She mumbled to herself, lost in her own thoughts. It was a terrifying experience. She had no idea what she was up against, and she was sure that she and Soos would be torn to shreds by the hormonally stressed out beasts. Yet Dipper, the shy and stubborn Meach who was so small for his life cycle, was able to calm an entire group of them. She couldn’t wrap her head around it. Normally Meaches Dipper’s size would be killed off from such aggressive Drones, and yet he wasn’t even claimed by them and held so much influence. Something didn’t sit right with the whole incident. The entire situation was… bizarre.

 

The computer screen blinked and gave off a soft blue glow on her face. Wendy typed in her password and opened her browser, readying herself for any extensive search. She turned to the small print of the open page, scanning  the text until she spotted the paragraph that caught her attention yesterday.

 

_ Though Meaches are known for their strong loyalty and determination concerning the Colony, Professor Fiddleford McGucket, of the University of Evergreen, has spent the last thirty years studying a rare phenomena that has been disrupting the Meach industry and is a concern for biologists and environmentalists. According to McGucket’s findings, a new breed of Meaches has come forth, one that is often rejected by its Colony and left for dead based off the scent it gives off. It can attract aggressive Meach Drones, endangering the populace of the Colony, while they search for a new Queen Meach. _

 

_ Normally, a new Queen Meach is escorted by its Mother’s subjects to a new location to start a new colony when the new Queen is in the middle of their life cycle. It is a careful process, not at all rushed, and is observed as a very important event for the entire Colony. To see the amount of care that goes into it is special of it’s own, because Meaches have been known as a highly social species that cares for every member of the Colony (the Queen producing new Meaches and directing the subjects, the subjects maintaining the Colony, and the Drones for reproducing and protection) which is rare amongst anthropomorphic beings. The behavior they exert is the basis of many behaviorists research and has even helped psychologists and sociologists as a reference of how humans can interact with one another.  _

 

_ That being said, Drones take care of any threat to the Colony, the only time they reject or abandon any member is if there is a disease or infectious outbreak. Even then, the Colony is loyal to the Queen and would rather die than abandon their Queen or a new Queen. So for the Drone Meaches to not protect a new Queen before they become of age, to out right abandon it, is alarming. McGucket thought that perhaps the new Queens were inflicted with a virus yet to be discovered or that there was a new fungi that has afflicted them, since this occurrence is only happening in the North America and parts of South America, however the problem seems to be deeper than any sickness. _

 

_ The scent itself in a Queen is very distinct and unique, however the new Queens that are being rejected share a distinct scent that clashes with their Mother Queen and irritates the colony. Extensive research by McGucket’s team revealed that the Mother Colony interprets the smell as though the new Queen was an intruder instead of a member of the Colony, and that this intruder is making familia Drones and Drones alike to become aggressive, to the point of killing one another and possibly the Queen. McGucket expressed that this new genetic mutation is troublesome, but it is part of evolution and that he and his team will conduct more research on these findings to help those who come across any trouble. _

 

Wendy furrowed her brow and, placing a finger where she left off on the page, moved to the front of the book. The publication of the book was 1984. ‘That would sort of explain Dipper, and those Drones hovering over him, but... How come I’ve never heard of this before?’ She briefly looked up to see Soos reading  _ Rare and Uncommon Anthropomorphic Plants _ . He looked bored as he read the places she marked, but she appreciated that he was trying.

 

She returned her focus to the book. Turning the pages, she found nothing more on the subject to her dismay. She turned toward her laptop and typed in the search bar: McGucket, genetic mutation, Meaches. Thousands of different articles popped up, making her groan. This was going to take a- “Oh no…”

 

Soos’ head snapped up. “What’s up, Wendy?” He took the last bite of his sandwich. “Is your peanut butter and nutella sandwich not doing it for you?”

 

Wendy shook her head. “Soos, I think this situation is a lot more serious than we thought.”

 

Soos looked concern. “I’m sorry, I didn’t think it was that big of a deal. I should have told you what I was making you before I gave it to you. I’ll ask next-”

 

“What? No, Soos, I’m not talking about the sandwich.” Soos gave her a confused look. She turned her laptop towards him. 

 

“‘Mass poaching has led the new breed of Meaches to extinction’... Whoa, what-” Soos grabbed the laptop and continued to read. “‘Since the discovery of a new breed of Meaches, and studies of how to care for the new breed’s Queens, was released in 1994, by renowned biologist and professor of University of Evergreen Professor Fiddleford McGucket, the fruit and taste of the new breed is so addictive it is up to par with other addictive substances such as morphine, alcohol, caffeine, and sugar combined. Because of the high demand, poachers have been hunting down and illegally killing these sentient beings, breaking the Endangered Species and Sentient Beings Protection Act of 1957. The law supposedly stopped the unjustified and morally corrupt murder of the Meaches, but that hasn’t stopped the black market and it’s clientele from seeking out a killing the new breed’. I didn’t even know there were different breeds.”

 

Wendy took back her laptop. “There are,” she handed him the book, opening it to the page her thumb. “Read these paragraphs here.” Soos nodded and silence fell between them. Wendy’s foot tapped the tile floor in anticipation. To distract herself she took a few bites of her sandwich. Every minute ticking by was grating on her nerves and she couldn’t help but start to get impatient as Soos kept reading.

 

Finally, he looked up. “So… Dipper is one of these new breeds, isn’t he?”

 

Wendy nodded solemnly. “That’s why those Drones were overly aggressive. That’s why he’s so young and by himself with no protection. That’s why his smell was so strong, and I can vouch that it’s not suppose to be  _ that _ heavy. But everyone thinks this breed is extinct.”

 

“So if someone else finds him before we get him here-”

  
Wendy nodded again. “It’s a huge risk if we are caught. Which is why we need to be even more hush-hush about all of this.” She closed the book and stood up, gathering her belongings and stuffing them in her bag. “I didn’t have all my questions answered today, but that’s not important. We need to get Dipper and those Drones out of the forest and somewhere safe.”


End file.
